A love story for teens by a teen with no love life.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Chapter 7 (post two)

Pre-note: I am posting during my philosophy lecture, so I shouldn't ramble on and on here! But please remember that I love comments and that this is only a first, rough draft :) 
Chapter seven (or six by my version), section two:
As I followed Jake through the school again, I glanced in the windows of classrooms. They were filled with girls in matching black and white uniforms, bent over blue and black notebooks. Every time I thought I was going to be one of them, I grew more nervous.
The school grounds were larger than they appeared. We stepped out of the back of the school; it was the head of a cluster of modern buildings in a rectangle around a garden. We followed winding paths across the grounds until we reached large building with the word “Residence” printed on a sign next to the double doors. Jake asked for my student card and waved it over a little silver box by the door, to which the doors responded to by opening up for us. I followed Jake through the doors, hoping he knew where he was going, to which room and by sending me here.
He took me on a tour of the residence building. Mostly it was halls of doors leading to residences, but on each floor there was a common room with a TV and comfy couches. The walls were all light blue, which gave the halls a homey feel. Even the elevator seemed clean and new while still feeling warm with wood panels. When we reached the sixth floor, I began to worry. I remembered my room was 67B, which probably meant it was the seventh door on the left on the sixth floor, if I understood the system correctly from my tour. Before he showed me my room, though, he took me all the way down the down the hall. At the end of the corridor was a steel door with a glowing “Exit” above it. He led me through to a gray cement staircase, obviously not often used. However, there was a door opposite of the one we’d come in by as well.
“I just wanted to see something,” Jake said. He used my student card to unlock the door, and I followed him through it.
We walked out onto a roof.
The space was large, although it was probably half the size of the residence building. The ground was made of simple cement that was fairly clean but obviously not used, for it was completely empty. The only objects were a bunch of furnace things over in the one corner and a fire escape staircase leading down the back of the building.
There were cement walls high enough so we couldn’t simply walk off, but when I peered over the edge I could see we were very high up. It was the view that was the best part, though. You could look down onto the suburbs of the surrounding areas and watch people in their own backyards, or you could see the garden of the school and the buildings circled around it.
“Wow, this is amazing,” Jake said.
“How did you know about it?” I asked, joining him to look over the school grounds.
“I was looking over your residence map, as I’ve never been here either but I wanted to give you a tour.” He said, “Then I saw these random doors and noticed they were marked green, meaning your access card would allow you to go out them. We’re now standing right on top of the library.”
“The view is amazing,” I said.
“Yeah, I’m surprised that more kids haven’t found this spot and used it.”
“I’m sure most don’t use the stairs, though,” I pointed out.
Just then bells rang to signal the end of classes. Students soon came streaming out the school building, spreading themselves thinly across the lawn and soon disappearing into the other buildings.
We watched for a moment, and then Jake started to point out buildings.
“That’s the gym, directly across from us. Next to it is the cafeteria, which is slightly ironic. Then the school is obviously all the way over to our right. The field is all the way to our left.”
“It’s neat that it’s all centered around a garden.”
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure all the schools are like this.”
“You said there were four schools in this city?”
“There are four high schools for each gender. There’s the North, East, West and South. All are boarding schools, as it makes it easier for the parents who are working.”
“That’s interesting.”
“The building across the street from this school is actually the boy’s West End high school.”
“Really? Right across from one another?”
“Yep. They sometimes have co-ed events, like fundraisers and things.”
“That’s really cool.”
We watched the people for a while. A lot of them stayed outside or went into the residence or gym building. I started to notice that most students went right to the residence first, changed of their uniform and into normal clothes. Some changed into sweatpants and basketball shorts, all in the school colours, and headed over to the gym. After some time a group of students in blue short-shorts appeared on the field and began a game of soccer.
“That’s the soccer team,” Jake said, “This school’s team has won every trophy for a very long time. You play?”
“Ha! No, I was never coordinated enough for most sports!” I replied.
“That’s ok. They have tons of clubs and things.”
“I noticed that art and gym aren’t courses I’m taking, does that still mean that I can join the art club or the soccer team?”
“All students take the same classes, including you, throughout high school. The clubs are a way you can do other things.”
“Oh. Ok. I guess I’ll do lots of clubs then.”
“That’s good! Well, I guess we should head to your dorm, should we?”

2 comments:

  1. Every time I thought I was going to be one of them, I grew more nervous.
    >"When I thought of how I might be one of them..." might be less awkward

    Nice overall feeling and the description makes the visual style of your school seem cohesive. I recommend breaking it up with more of Anika's opinions about certain parts of the school just so the reader isn't swamped with description. Another good trick is to incorporate description that doubles as your character engaging with her surroundings, ex. "My shoes squeaked on the polished wood floor" as opposed to simply stating the floors are made of wood.

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  2. Dristy says she would love to read your blog if only there were more bromance present.

    (You may want to ask Dristy for her definition of "bromance")

    ReplyDelete